The Poo Patrol

Poo Patrol 1 thek9harperlee

There are a lot of fun things about sharing your life with a dog–long walks in beautiful places, road trips to meet fun friends, kitchen time to whip up some yummy treats. There are even glamorous occasions, like attending a black-tie fundraiser to help other animals find loving homes. And then there’s the Poo Patrol. The Poo Patrol is neither fun nor glamorous, bit it is necessary. So every couple of days, my human mommy pulls out her rubber boots, her trusty little shovel, and what we call a poo poo bag (it’s actually a plastic grocery bag), and she hits the back yard in search of poo.

Poo Patrol 2 thek9harperlee

I like to maintain a safe distance as she meticulously walks the yard in a grid searching for her treasure. To me the Poo Patrol is part spectator sport, part supervisory opportunity. Sometimes, as Mommy crosses from one end of the yard to the other, she’ll say to me, “Where’s the poo, Miss Lee?” From my distant perch, I answer her with complete silence. She’s a big girl. She can find it on her own.

Poo Patrol 3 thek9harperlee

Generally, after just a few minutes, the Poo Patrol is complete, the bag is tied, and it’s ready for the garbage can. You might notice something slightly orange in the bag. No, friends, I do not poo orange. This time of year, our orange tree starts to drop its fruit, so Mommy combines the Poo Patrol with the Discarded Orange Pickup. She’s efficient that way. You might also notice that the grass is still a little brown and there are leaves on the ground. That can add a bit of a challenge to the poo search, if you know what I mean. So during the winter months I eat the rabbit flavor of my food . . . which is a deep, rich color and produces an easy-to-spot equally deep, rich-colored poo. Oh dear, I think that just might have been too much information, as the humans like to say.

Poo Patrol 4 thek9harperlee

And do you want to know the most fun thing about the Poo Patrol? The minute that my mommy has completed the pickup, tied that little bag with a big knot, and dropped it into the trash can, I like to walk out into my newly pristine yard and drop a little something special for her. Just think of it as job security for the human in charge of the Poo Patrol.


22 Comments on “The Poo Patrol”

  1. Dina says:

    Hahaha, you lovely Angel, great reading! 😀 ❤

  2. We are really trying hard to do poo patrol this winter, it is tough with the nasty cold weather but I think we got a handle on it. Very cute boots!

    • The cute boots are very functional–just in case Mommy is not watching carefully during the Poo Patrol, these boots can be hosed off. 😉 And I really feel for you trying to do Poo Patrol in such cold weather. That cannot be fun (she said, as if Poo Patrol is ever “fun”).

  3. PigLove says:

    Oh snorts beautiful. I look at it as you are helping mom fertilize that yard for a awesome summer paradise. Yeah, that’s it. Fertilizer. XOXO – Bacon

  4. Emmadog says:

    My mom loves to watch the neighbors do their poo patrol. We don’t poo in our yard, only on walks. Mom doesn’t want any landmines in the yard ever. The only exception is if we are sick, but even then we prefer to walk a block or two to do our business. Glad your mom cleans up regularly.

    • Interesting that you don’t like to poo in your own yard. Mommy has had dogs who were exactly opposite–they refused to poo on walks. Someone needs to write a research paper on that: “The Poo Preferences of Pups.” 🙂

  5. Hehehe!! What a considerate woofie you are! LOVE your Mom’s boots!

  6. OMD! We are living parallel lives! Great idea about the rabbit flavor. I didn’t know that and always tell Bentley that he should eat fluorescent food. Check out this bag holder my husband made for me to use! *It’s easier to show you~

  7. fredrieka says:

    My new sister bon bon walks while she poops sometimes 50 feet worth my dad is not fond of the poop trail

  8. Yuppers, I like to keep my distance too…I don’t need to see it twice, right? Ma says try spotting poopies in mulch..brown mulch…not so easy! Then again, she says I never make her life easy…What??? that’s just not nice! Anyhu, I do the same thing….I wait til Ma dumps the poopie bag in the trash, then give her a new specimen!! We gotta keep them on their toes right?! BOL!!!
    Ruby ♥

    • Honestly, Ruby, without us our humans would be so totally bored. No one to feed; no one to let out, and in, and out, and in, and out; no hair to pick up; and no poop to sccop. What kind of life would that be? 🙂

  9. LOL Just like our cat who waits as I am cleaning the box so that she can use it.

    • I know you humans think we have some sort of devious plan–just staring at you as you take care of our “business” and then “christening” (as my daddy calls it) the newly cleaned litter box or lawn. You might be right. 😉

  10. Jan K says:

    LOL…job security! I like to think of the poo patrol as a treasure hunt…around and around the yard looking for it. BTW, with 3 dogs, poo patrol is daily around our house, sometimes twice a day (when the weather is nice). You dogs are all the same….yes, as soon as I put the supplies away, someone has to make a new deposit!

  11. Dudley ate so many carrots, his poo was orange. Once Zoe ate some coasters that had prints of Van Gogh paintings and some of it didn’t digest and came out where I could really say, “my dog poops Van Gogh!” I miss those dogs, but Louie is great. His poo is pretty boring. He’s still waiting to see Miss Lee in her tutu.

    • Haha! When mommy was young and single, she lived in a condo complex and had a little dog named Sheffield. Sheffield liked to eat the towels in his crate, and when Mommy took him for his very public “business” walks, out came the towels. Very embarrassing!

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