This is me on drugs. It all started bright and early yesterday morning . . . a little too bright and early for my taste. Normally my human mommy lets me sleep in while she gets up to prepare my breakfast, but not yesterday. Just past the crack of dawn, I heard, “Come on, Miss Lee. We need to get going.” She led me into the laundry room, where I usually find my breakfast waiting for me, but my bowl was empty and the water bowl was missing. Hmmmmm, something was not quite right. Then she hooked my leash to my collar and we set out on our morning walk, but there was something not quite right about the route we were taking. And then all of a sudden it hit me: We were headed toward the V-E-T. WHAT!?!
Most of the day was a total blur. I have no idea what hit me, but the next thing I knew it was the afternoon and I was sitting in an exam room. I vaguely recall my human mommy having a conversation with my V-E-T. There was something about my teeth being beautiful and clean. And then they started talking about my butt. WHAT!?!
Remember when I assisted Dr. Julie Buzby as she presented “All Hands on Dog: 10 Touches That Could Save Your Dog’s Life” at BlogPaws 2017? Do you remember Touch 10: Under the Tail? Well, Dr. Buzby found a very small mass in a private place just under my tail. (I’m not going to be more specific. This is embarrassing enough. I think you know where.) Naturally, my human mommy immediately brought it to the attention of my V-E-T, and we decided to watch it and, if we didn’t see any changes, to wait to remove it when I had my next teeth cleaning. In other words, friends, I got it at both ends yesterday. But I also got some pretty good drugs, so I’m not complaining. The V-E-T says that he doesn’t expect the little mass to be anything serious, but just in case it’s gone to the lab to be analyzed. We’ll get the results later this week or early next week. Until then, I’m going to enjoy my buzz as long as I possibly can.
So last night my human mommy/blogging assistant had a slight goof. Somehow the pushed the giant PUBLISH button before I had finished telling my story. What do you have to do to get a decent assistant these days? Anyway, my apologies to anyone who received that unfinished version of my tale. Here’s the complete story. I hope you enjoy.
Last week I went to the V-E-T to have my teeth cleaned. This is me post-procedure. I probably don’t need to tell you that when it comes to anaesthesia I’m a little lightweight. I don’t remember much of the day, but I’ll tell you what I do recall: My human mommy forced me to rise and shine at what seemed to be an utterly ungodly hour of the morning. OK . . . so it was 6 a.m. . . . but I’m not a morning girl, so that was a bit of a jolt. I staggered into the kitchen only to discover that my food and water bowls were missing. Then I remembered that I was denied my usual go-to-bed treat the night before. Something was definitely fishy. And that’s when we got into my chariot (what you would call a car) and started driving. Before I knew what was happening, we were at the V-E-T clinic. Now I’ve told you before that I love, love, love my vet, so at this point I was pretty happy . . . hungry, but happy. Unfortunately, that’s basically the last moment I remember from that day. The next thing I knew, I was back at home and Mommy’s crazy camera was flashing in front of my dopey face while she giggled. Isn’t that just typical of our humans?
So at this point I know what you’re thinking: “Miss Harper Lee, that’s an interesting story and all, but what in the world does any of this have to do with Tasty Tuesday.” Well, I’ll tell you. There are two key connections between my teeth cleaning and Tasty Tuesday. First, it’s extremely important to maintain dental health so that I can chew on all of my tasty treats. (Just for the record, I had an excellent report.) And second, I got this fabulous new powder that goes on my food to help keep my teeth and gums healthy. . . and it tastes just like a treat! It’s called Perio Support and it’s made by the people at VetriScience Laboratories “to help maintain clean teeth and fresh breath. It is formulated to help control plaque formation and to support gum health.” (That’s a quote from their website. You can click here to read more.)
When I finally regained enough coherency that evening to eat dinner, Mommy sprinkled a bit of the Perio Support on my food. WOW! This stuff is fantastic. I’ve even seen Mommy sniffing it and saying something about it being good enough to put on chicken to grill for humans. Oh no you don’t, Mommy. It says right on the label that it’s only for canines and felines.
And it’s way too yummy for me to share, even when I’m slightly groggy!
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When I woke up this morning, it was raining cats and dogs. (You know that’s just a saying, right? I mean, cats and dogs were not literally falling from the sky. Well, of course you knew that.) Clearly, this was not going to be a good hair day.
And then my human mommy delivered some devastating news. Because of all the rain, we would not be going for our morning walk. What? I have webbed feet, so I seriously did not see why we couldn’t handle a few puddles. Apparently, though, Mommy’s feet are not webbed, so she vetoed the walk. Whatever. But there was a silver lining to my rainy-gray-cloud day. Instead of taking our morning walk, we were going to the V-E-T for my annual checkup.
Now I know what a lot of my puppy dog friends are thinking right now: Going to the V-E-T is absolutely not a silver lining. In fact, for a lot of you, going to the V-E-T is actually one giant gray cloud. (You’ll note that I am spelling out V-E-T because I know that for some the mere mention of the word makes you tremble.) But I have to say that I love, love, love visiting my V-E-T. (You can click here to read all about my friends at Jefferson Animal Hospital and the laser treatment I had there for my elbow dysplasia.)
Mommy, can’t you see that it’s raining and I’m eager to get into the V-E-T’s office? Take your silly picture and let’s go.
And just when I thought that going to the V-E-T couldn’t possibly get any better, we walked through the door and there was my friend Honey, who lives down the street from me. Time to meet and greet and catch up on all the neighborhood gossip.
And of course, kisses, kisses, kisses. (Note to my blogging assistant/photographer/human mommy: If you cannot learn to take non-blurry action photos, I’m going to have to find a new photographer.) Honey and I could have stayed in the reception area playing and kissing all day long, but apparently humans have these things called schedules and appointments, so we had to go our separate ways.
After a quick weigh-in (just for the record, my weight is perfect), I went to a very exciting back room for my exam. My V-E-T checked my ears and my eyes . . . and then he looked at my teeth. Turns out that I’ll be going back to the V-E-T in a few weeks to have my teeth cleaned. You may recall the last time I had my teeth cleaned. As my dear piggy friend Bacon said, I was a DUI–Doggy Under the Influence. (The photos are here if you need a good laugh.)
Then came the needles. Oops . . . I guess I should have warned you that photo was on its way. I had a little blood drawn and then got poked several times with various vaccinations before having something squirted up my nose. I did not see that coming, but through it all I was a real trooper and never let out the slightest little cry.
The next part of the exam was a little humiliating. Let’s just say that it happened pretty far back from my nose. I have a feeling that they do that part last because it’s a little hard to make eye contact after a human has been back there doing that. Fortunately, everything looked good under the microscope. Is that too much information?
And just like that, my annual V-E-T visit was over and I was back home. Between visiting with my friend Honey and then being the center of human attention while I stood nicely on the exam table, the whole morning was quite exhausting. I think I’ll just put my head down and take a little nap. Wake me when dinner is served.